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(an e-mail I sent to my pastor in response to the sermon he gave today. Regarding something he talked about that made me think on the word – compassion.)

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I want to say more about the word “love”. I just don’t care much for that word. It’s been bandied about too much. Like an old wad of crumpled duct tape. It’s kind of useless anymore.

I love potato chips (?)

I mean. Come on!

But – compassion….

Now that’s a word you can sink your teeth into. I never knew what the bottom line was for the word ‘compassion’. I’m really glad you explained it to us. All seven organs making up our ‘viscera’ being wrenched and ripped apart. I believe it, what you said about it in your sermon this morning.

When you’ve been abused, the word ‘love’ gets fairly warped. Actually to the point of becoming unrecognizable. Parents use it on you and then beat the shit out of you in various ways. And other people say “But you know that they love you, don’t you?” It’s disgusting. By the time I had grown into adulthood I had not one clue about the word.

But “compassion” was left alone.

You just can’t say;

I compassion potato chips.

or

You know they compassion you, don’t you?

I think God did that. The word has been kept safe, away from the abusers. It’s a sacred word, used only toward holding, in the highest regard, other living things. It can’t be used in any other way. Though the word ‘love’ rotted in my brain as I was being horribly abused throughout my life, I’ve never lost the meaning of that word – compassion.

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