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(the first post in this series is here:  On Being A Social Outcast )
There is a link at the bottom of this post
that will take you to the next post in this series.

So…. About Space Mountain.

For those of you who don’t have a clue what I’m talking about. Space Mountain is a carnival ride at Disney Land in California, USA. It’s a roller coaster ride through pitch blackness. It’s so black on this ride that you literally can’t see your hand in front of your face no matter how long you stare at it, no matter how many times you blink your eyes, or how hard you try. There’s not one stitch of light in the whole place. It’s a very, very bizarre ride, and it’s absolutely terrifying. You get pitched forward and back, left and right. At some points you’ll be going straight up north, then suddenly you’re twisted and headed, lightening speed… straight down. You feel like your life is in dire peril the whole time while being completely at the mercy of menacingly gigantic and powerful outside forces you have absolutely no control over. All you can do is hang on, scream for all you’re worth, and pray to make it through alive.

Well I want to parallel the way my life has been, both drinking and sober, with that ride on Space Mountain. I’ve hung onto sobriety, screaming helpless for my life in the pitch black, and prayed for all I was worth, to make it through alive.

I don’t want to jink this but… I think I might finally be seeing a little daylight. I’m not sure yet. This may only just be a short respite in the ride. But (dare I hope?) I think I can make out just a little bit of light. I don’t know for sure yet, but… maybe? I’m praying.

The next post in this series is here:   Could It Really Be True? Am I Beginning to See the End of the Ride?

(to go back to: More Problems… Damn It:  click HERE )