I was talking to an AA new-comer the other day and, as I was talking to her, this came to the forefront of my mind.
I have a ‘funny spot’ in my brain.
In my brain there is a ‘funny spot’ that only certain chemicals and stuff will hit, and alcohol is just one of these. When I drank it, it did something to a spot in my brain that made all my troubles magically go away. When I drank it, somehow I felt lifted up out of the muck of my life.
You know what’s so funny though?
I know a person who was totally addicted to Vicodin. But in my brain, Vicodin doesn’t hit my particular ‘funny spot’ at all. In many other people, chemicals like this one definitely hit their funny spots. For these people, if they want to continue with their emotional growth in sobriety, these are ‘No, No’ chemicals.
But don’t tell me I can’t take Vicodin. My funny spot is my own business! Not yours! I have ulcerative colitis. It’s exceedingly painful to say the least. I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. When I’m in the middle of an attack I can loose 10 pounds a week there’s so much pain. Vicodin will relieve the pain to a certain degree. The strange thing is though, that when the attack subsides and the pain diminishes… I don’t like how Vicodin makes me feel!… Vicodin serves only to relieve my physical pain. It does not hit my funny spot… at all.
Each person is different. I can’t take ‘Comptrex’ for flu symptoms. Comptrex definitely hits my funny spot. A few minutes after I took one, I looked at the bottle and said to myself…
Hummmm. How soon can I take another one of these?
I had to pour the entire contents of the bottle down the toilet.
I also know that I can’t take Soma for muscle pain. Soma definitely hits my funny spot.
I don’t exactly know what that funny spot is, but I know when I’ve hit it. Totally, totally for sure I know it! But I don’t know yours, so I keep my nose out of your funny spot business.
You know what’s so funny though? It doesn’t necessarily have to be a chemical that hits a person’s funny spot. It can be… gambling… shopping… relationships… cigarettes… specific drugs… (most unfortunately for some) sex… pornography… work… food… computer games… stuff like houses and cars… money… power over other people… there are a thousand things that can hit one’s funny spot. But for me it’s most and foremost… alcohol.
I am in the process of letting go of all my funny spot ticklers. My goal? To become fully committed to God through constant, conscious, contact with Him. Because, to my way of thinking, He is the one and only funny-spot-tickler I know of, that works… without having any bad side-effects.