Feeding My Finches

Tags

child abuse, christianity, Faith, Finch, God, Holy Spirit, inspiration, Israelite, Jesus, Miracle, spiritual

Until today, my faith has been really lacking regarding God’s super-natural happenings. I am definitely a doubting Thomas. Because I wasn’t a witness to all that Jesus did, my logical brain could not honestly believe that any of the events occurred.  Jesus performing all those miracles; dieing in order to save us; providing a Spirit to live in us. Blah, Blah, Blah…

One More Time…

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abandonment, anti-social, child abuse, Christian, Family, Mental health, mental illness, PTSD, rejection, relationship

Many times I’ve heard in AA… “What you think of me is none of my business.” But I don’t seem to be able to jump that hurdle…yet. The paranoia of rejection blows mightily inside me. It shreds me until I’m stupid.

My “NEW” God

Tags

alcoholism, child abuse, Christian, God, inspiration, Jesus, Mental disorder, Mental health, mental illness, PTSD, relationship, religion, spiritual, testimony

My father was a powerful, powerful, undiagnosed, mentally unbalanced man. In fact, even to this day, I have never met a more powerful human being on this planet.

When I was a little kid he used to twirl me around by my arm like a helicopter and beat me while screaming stuff at me. I don’t remember what the stuff was he screamed at me because I was terrified I would be killed =accidentally= by getting my neck broken.

Testimony: Part 1

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I saw

“The Glory of God“

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Testimony: Part 2

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NOTE: This happened to me when I was alone. There was no one with me to interfere in the experience.

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How It Began

It was February, 1982. I had just celebrated my 2^nd year birthday being sober in AA.  Married to another recovering alcoholic, it was just after our 1^st wedding anniversary when the shit hit the fan.  I was starting to learn why so many alcoholics don’t make it. I was slowly going crazy with emotional pain.

Testimony: Part 3

the “book”.

Out of the corner of my eye I spied a little black book laying by itself on the night-stand.  Somehow it turned my gaze. The cover read “The Soul Savers Bible”. This was so strange to see a bible there.  Neither Ron nor I ever read the bible. I didn’t even know I had one in the house let alone that it would be pulled out as if someone had been reading it. With shaking hands I picked it up and opened it at random.  At the top of the page it opened to – there read these words…..

What You Must Do To Be Saved

Testimony: Part 4

My Response to all this

Well, this was as far away from what I’d been taught in my childhood… and still adhered to… as East is from West.  Jesus’ life, the healing miracles and such were all fables to be used for god-only-knows-what purpose.  And especially, this resurrection from the dead business – well that was complete hogwash.  Yet how did this little paperback book come to be here where I could so easily find it? And how did it open directly to a page that so thoroughly addressed my most pressing need?

Testimony: Part 5

Then the magic began…

Jesus said to her; “If you would but believe”
(100% in all the miracles and that
He was raised from the dead.)
“you would  see the Glory of  God !
John 11:40

I am telling you the absolute truth here. This really did happen, and I believe it can happen to you if you are 100% willing to  let go  of all your old ideas about what reality is.

This is what I realized later.

Reality is sooo much different than we think it is. This is the actual truth of our reality…. Jesus is as alive today as we are! He’s as much alive today as He was when He walked with us in the flesh. And, if you ask Him into your home, having this 100% belief that He will come in, then He will come in and sup with you too, just like He did with me.

Testimony: Part 6

Tags

alcoholism, Bipolar disorder, child abuse, Christ, christianity, God, Holy Spirit, inspiration, Jesus, PTSD, relationship, religion, sobriety, spirituality, testimony

In Conclusion

Do you believe this impossible story?  I can only say that what I have told you is God’s truth.  It happened in 1982, and it’s  still as vivid to me today as though it had happened yesterday.

Our Father Weeps

Tags

alcoholism, child abuse, Christian, christianity, cooties, crying, Father-God, Holy Spirit, inspiration, Jesus, rabies, relationship, spiritual, weep

Along with many, many others, this is for my blogging buddy:  Graeme
who writes posts that inspired me to write this.

A warning. This is very base. It was difficult to write; difficult to expose. But I felt led to write it and publish it because I think it’s necessary for others to understand how deeply Father-God loves us. His love for us goes deeper than we could ever, ever comprehend.

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Wait…

Here is a post from Along The Way. This poem really resonated with me.

dawn breaks,

mountains loom,

fog settles in the valleys of our being…

We wait…

living in the “not knowing”,

paralysis advancing,

hope a distant echo,

vision dimmed

longing reduced to embers…

Yet in the mist Mystery dwells,

and if we wait, Light dissipates what covers us,

what was looming is redefined as beauty…

 In the waiting, Light’s dawning arises within…

 

 so wait…wait…

Doing the Hard Thing

Tags

abstinence, Anger, anti-social, child abuse, Christian, christianity, church, compulsive overeating, God, Holy Spirit, Intimate relationship, Jesus, Mental health, sobriety

Do you want to really know your Father in Heaven?

Do you want to have an intimate relationship with Him?

Do you want to feel His Love, Wisdom and Power in your life?

Well, there’s one way I know of  that will give you this.

It’s called “Doing The Hard Thing.”

What I Am Thankful For…

Tags

christianity, gratitude, thankfulness

Like Looking for Golden Easter Eggs  —  It’s My Job to Find Them. To load my basket full of these Golden Gems of Happiness. For me, it’s an Essential Secret Ingredient to Having a Happy Sobriety and a Happy LIFE!!

Practicing keeping all these beautiful, wonderful things in my mind as much as I can has made all the difference in my life. Doing this has made life as good tasting as it could possibly be. And I believe I’ve just scratched  the surface of  all  the good things out there that God has provided. This is my ‘secret ingredient’  to a good, contented life.

There’s 241 golden eggs in my basket.

How can I not be butt happy?       .